Components of a wedding ceremony, and why they matter

No two ceremonies are the same, but these components of a wedding ceremony are a great place to start. From here you can add, omit, adapt and—most importantly—infuse with personality and authenticity.

Procession

Processions are so common that people often overlook them as a ritual, yet this is when the ceremony begins. There’s music from live musicians or a DJ. There’s your inner circle of immediate family and a wedding party paving the way for your entrance. Through the procession you honor people close to you, and your music choices set the tone.

Welcome, centering, and completing community

A welcome is a chance to acknowledge the momentousness of the moment, to invite people to shift their mindset. They may have experienced traffic or confusion on the way there, they may have worried about being late. We need to have them set that all aside to be fully present. We thank them for being there—witnesses are a key element of any wedding ceremony.
This is also a chance to acknowledge people who are missing, those who couldn’t travel and those loved ones who are deceased. Sometimes we name specific people, and sometimes we even make ritual space for them.

Love Story

Your story. Of meeting, of loving, of recognizing this person as your person. Through the Soulful Wedding Roadmap process we’ll decide which parts of your story are right to share on your wedding day. Laughter and tears guaranteed.

Relationship reflection and dreams
This part is often intertwined with the story. But aside from your history as a couple it’s worth waxing on why your relationship works, and how you imagine bringing this forward into your married life.

Readings

Once we’ve established what your marriage means to you, and those around you, we can select readings that help articulate it. Readings can come from almost anywhere—scripture, movie quotes, pop songs, novels, essays, poems written by family members, and more.

Readings do not only have to be about marriage. They can be about love more broadly, about community, adventure, savoring life, nature and more.

Rituals

A ritual is an act that brings change. It brings meaning into a third dimension (not just seeing and hearing the ceremony). An exchange of rings is the most common ritual—the exchange symbolizes the verbal exchange of vows. Yet there are many, many, more rituals we can employ. We can enact or adapt something from a religious tradition and we can invent our own as we discover meaning together.

Read more about my definition of ritual. 

Question of Intent / Commitment Statement / Declaration of Intent

This is the critical legal piece. You affirm who you are and that you are willingly entering into this union with your partner. Traditionally the question is asked, “Do you…?” and of course the answer is: “I do!”

Vows

The vows and Question of Intent can be weaved together or separated. Vows can be a ”repeat after me” offering, or you can speak something you’ve prepared yourself. The definition of vow is simply “promise.” The tone, specificity, and grandeur or simplicity of the words will be up to you.

Pause or blessing

Don’t rush off in a surge of adrenaline. Pause to soak in and remember the moment. In a religious ceremony a marriage blessing or a benediction would be offered. For non religious ceremonies, just crafting a moment to go inward is enough.

Proclamation

The grand finale stating what has been done in both a legal and spiritual sense. Most often it concludes with, “I now pronounce you…”

Recession

The grand exit, set to music and a big applause! Logistically, it’s the opposite order of the procession.

Humor, honesty, tenderness, appreciation, gratitude…

Key elements to any ceremony! Woven throughout in the tapestry of your story and promise.

If you’re wondering how to use these elements to craft a meaningful rite of passage, check out the Soulful Wedding Roadmap.

More from the blog